You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
the majority of my texts from you are at 3 AM & consist of either "I'm drunk", "you're asian", or "bratwurst"
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
This is a mass text to all my friends. Whoever gets this first, please find me and confiscate my phone immediately. I am far too high to have it. Even if you have to punch me in my face to get it. Otherwise, let the "High While Analyzing Disney Movies" texts begin.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Randomize
