i wish peter jackson would direct porn
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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