Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
Come over? It's my birthday
How many times has that text failed you tonight?
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
Please come collect your inebriated significant other. He just sleep-farted and scared my cats. Please hurry.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
Randomize
