So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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