This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
the night ended with taco bell and tears
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
