if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
Randomize
