Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
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