apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
Randomize
