It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Randomize
