Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
Randomize
