Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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