She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
maybe you met your husband and you just don't know it yet
and other hilarious jokes you can tell yourself
Randomize
