he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
Randomize