I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
Randomize
