I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Randomize