frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
Randomize
