I must be too annoying 4 u.
You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
Randomize
