HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
Randomize
