And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
Randomize
