love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
Randomize
