Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
At least be KIND OF sobering up before you text me, I've told you before I don't speak vodka unless I've been drinking it with you.
PS WHY wasn't I drinking it with you? Dick.
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize
