Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
