Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
Randomize
