whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
I look excited, but its just a facade.
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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