hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
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