I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
Randomize
