Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
Randomize