So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
Randomize
