**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
Randomize
