True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
YOU WOULD BE SEEING ME. IN MY KITCHEN. BENDING OVER MY OVEN. MAKING YOU CAKE.
Wait, that's an option?
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
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