what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
No more Irish car bombs ever.
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Randomize