I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Randomize
