the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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