Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
Randomize
