I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
Randomize
