it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
That accounts for only three of the penises
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
Randomize
