dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
Randomize
