i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
How come I'm the only one who's around when people show up? I had just taken a shit, I wasn't wearing pants, phantom of the opera was playing and the fridge said PENIS.
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
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