dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
