Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
Randomize
