i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Randomize
