This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
i just made my gag reflex go away.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
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