Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
I love how my cats smell like pot.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
Randomize
