There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
Randomize
