This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
She just used a chaser for red wine.
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Randomize
