A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
Things I've learned: after you move in with a girl it's much less satisfying to wipe your dick on her sheets after sex because now they're your sheets too
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Randomize
