If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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