Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
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