just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished�
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
