so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
Randomize
